First-timer

I always have thoughts and ideas floating around in my head.  I have things that I'm excited about.  I have things that I'm afraid of.  I have things that I have learned.  I have things that I worry about.  I have memories, some recent, some very old.  I have things that make me sad.  I have new information that I have learned that I am trying to integrate with what I know already.  Sometimes I have new information that I don't really know what to do with!  Sometimes I have questions about myself.  Why do I really like this thing?  Why am I afraid of that thing?  I remember driving my father crazy when I was little because I always asked so many questions.  Most of the time my thoughts just stay up there in my head.  I am a pretty quiet person.  I don't like to be the center of attention, most of the time.  I don't like to cause trouble or be the cause of trouble for someone else.  I would call myself an observer.  I like peace, not contention.  I don't know if others would agree with that, but that is how I think of myself.  I've thought about having a blog for many years now.  Well, today is the day that I am going to start putting some of those thoughts that are floating around in my head down in words.  We shall see how long I can keep this up.  Consistency isn't one of my strengths.  I tend to go in spurts with long pauses in-between.

Thought for the day:

My mind seems to want to make sense of things.  I think it likes structure and order.  It always wants to put things in a slot.  Not just any slot - the perfect slot.  If there's not a perfect slot to put it in then it floats around until my mind finds a perfect slot.  Maybe that's why so many thing are floating around in my head all the time.  Sometimes there just isn't a perfect slot.  I guess if I don't find that perfect slot, then my mind just ejects that idea or thought, or files it away to be brought out later.  I can imagine that "later" file looking like the large pile of filing that is always waiting to be done in my office.  I hate filing.  I just pile things up until I really need something.  Then I file it all at once, all in one sitting - a marathon filing party.  Then I don't file anything again until the pile starts to fall over or until I really need something out of it again.  That is just one of the many things about myself that just doesn't make sense.  If I like structure and order, then why don't I file things and keep up with it so that it doesn't pile up like that?  Hmmmm. . . .